Nobody Ever Grows Up Quite Like They Planned To

credits to google

When I was little, things were just simple. It was like, if I want to do or have something, I just have to do or get it and it will be mine. I picture the roads as straight lines; no humps, manholes, or whatsoever that would deny me a smooth ride.

When I grew a little older, I learned how to dream. I started picturing myself in the future; how I would look like, and what I would be. I hoped to be a doctor so I can cure sick people and make them feel fine. I remember I even asked my mother if it's possible to construct a hospital in a vacant lot near our house. I forgot what she said. Anyway, it doesn't matter now. hehe...

Days passed and I started going to school. Well, elementary days were slumbook days. LOL. We all know what's in there, right? There is a question that says, "what do you want to be when you grow up?" It never fails to make me think HARD. hahaha. But then I never wrote DOCTOR in any of the slumbooks I answered. Instead, I wrote, COMPUTER SCIENCE. LOL. I know, it doesn't sound like the right answer. :) Computer-related courses were the most in demand during the time, so...

In highschool, during my senior years, I wasn't really sure what I want. I took up the UPCAT [UP College Admission Test] and passed. However, the course I wrote in my application form wasn't really what I wanted so I didn't enroll in the UP branch where I passed. Instead, I decided to take up B.S Accountancy in a university here in Nueva Ecija. But all my friends were taking up Nursing, so you can guess what happened next.

*BSN 4 - block 6, group IV*

Graduation Day with my best-EST friends.

via

Tadaaaaaa! Yeah you are right. Let's not elaborate that anymore. hehehe. :)

So, do I have any regrets?

Maybe a little. Just when time comes that I couldn't find any job related to my profession. ALAM NA... haha :)

Why am I writing this by the way?

Few more days and I'll be working in the hospital setting again. I would be and would do NURSE *things* again. And, lately I've been seeing my patients' faces in my dreams. Not all the patients, I mean, just the dead ones. I couldn't forget how they struggled to live longer. I remember how an old man hoped he'll regain strength and make it home with his family but died that evening [related post: on death and dying]. I remember the last time I assisted a lady drink her meds then died in the morning. How could I forget a lola who I always ask, "kamusta po kayo ngayon?" then she'd smile and say, "ok naman apo." Then she died during my shift. It makes me think, "how many more people would die in front of me?"

I know, God put me in here. He wants me to be exactly where I am right now. Maybe, it's His way of telling me that, "LIFE IS SHORT, child..." Or something like, "You can do something to help people die peacefully."

Only He knows.

How 'bout you? Have you grown up the way you planned to?